My Oh My What a Wonderful Day!

I feel very bad because there is a backyard in view from our living room window that my two year old often points to and says "I love slide". These neighbors have a swing set with slide and everything included. It is so sad because she gets so happy like if she asks nice enough she will be able to go out and play in it. So today, as soon as I heard it was going to be nice out (65 degrees was the high) we took showers and headed outside. It was so great. Of course she was on the slide right away and then went back to last year's infamous swing. The thing is, I am not the type of person to be trying to dictate where she should play, but when there are so many other things to do why not run around and do that? Anyway, I let her be on the swing for as long as she wanted, but as if someone knew how badly I wanted her to just run around and "have fun" at the park she noticed a little girl by the slide that she decided she wanted to play with. I was in heaven! I am always looking for new people to chat it up with at the park, especially those that have kids in my children's age range. Well, up to now it had only been my toddler's age, but you get my point. AND here she finds the cutest little girl who is very interested in playing with her too. My daughter is very much a leader so she took the little girl by the hand and led her to where she wanted to play and the little girl happily followed. I am happy to say that at the end of this unintended play date, I exchanged numbers with her mom and we're planning another (this time planned) play date.... what a beautiful day!!!

Dare I say the "C" word?

I've had a rough past few days.... I feel really badly for my 2 year old who is getting the short end of the stick because my frustration level has peaked and she happens to be around the most. I have come to the "unofficially diagnosed" conclusion that my 3 month old daughter has infant colic. (From Wikipedia- "[an infant has colic if] she cries intensely more than three days a week, for more than three hours, for more than three weeks in a month." This and many other things have led me to this conclusion. I will briefly allow you into my world for the past three months.
I tried to breastfeed- it was a DISASTER!!!!!!!!! My baby did not sleep a wink, in fact she would only sleep when she was on the breast. I only found out she was not getting enough nutrients and was "pretend sucking" (really only sleeping) because she was borderline Jaundice and I had to supplement. When I tried to take her off the formula and only offer breast milk she became worse so I had to keep up with the supplement. With this began the bouts with the formula. Essentially, the only way she would calm was if she was held- not in a carrier or sling, in MY arms in a certain position that does not leave any hand free.
Now mind you, this may not have been SO HORRIBLE had I not had a two-year old running around craving my attention. She is very well-spoken for her age and told me very often that every time she wanted to do something with me it was "BABY BABY BABY EVERY TIME!" I realized at this point that if I did not let up on trying to breastfeed, the relationship between my older daughter and her baby sister was going to be a bad one.
The first few days (I can't even pretend to remember accurately because it really feels to me like one big blur-not in a good way) were okay. She fed and slept appropriately, but then the screaming began. No, not crying, SCREAMING!! She would have days with one hr TOTAL of sleep and this did not mean that she was up just hanging around, nope, she was screaming without being able to calm. I would get a slight glimpse into what I knew could be a reality (as per first child) but it was only a glimpse and it was followed by endless screaming and fussiness.
This, my friends, has not ended. I have tried changing formula several times from sensitive to gentle to hypersensitive to I don't even know what else. I have tried "natural" home remedies like Chamomile and gripe water, but all things only offer temporary relief. I'm at my wits end and don't know what to do.
I am sure there are parents out there who have battled with infant colic (because I'm with you- this is a battle, one I am trying desperately to win, but a battle nonetheless). PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE let me know I am not alone.... and if so, what have you done???? Does this end? Maybe just hearing from someone who has been through this can help me see the light.

Adventures at the Zoo

It was a beautiful Sunday morning so we decided to pack the family up and go to the zoo. It would be the first time that we took the girls and we knew our 2-year-old would absolutely LOVE it, especially since her current favorite DVD is Barney at the Zoo. We were right, she LOVED it. More about that in a minute. Let me just tell you a little about what this day started like. We planned on being out by ten AM but since we spent a sleepless night up with the baby it was hardly easy to do anything in the morning but we were determined so we proceeded as if we had not had the kind of night we had. (I will spare you the details but just imagine, lots of screaming and no sleeping). Since we were going to be doing a lot of walking I knew this would be the perfect opportunity to take out the Double Stroller, but unfortunately it was still in the box-again, determination took over and I decided I would build it before we left. It took me about 20 minutes (maybe more like a half hour) to figure out how to open up the darn thing and then another 40 minutes to put it together. I often am the one to step up and want to build the things that need to be built or fixed (something I've loved doing since I was a child) but it was rather frustrating to be building something and have my spousal equivalent walk by laughing about how frustrated I was. Mind you, I did not want him to help as that would have made it worse, but just keeping his mouth shut would have sufficed.
So low and behold the "school bus" was built. And we were off to the Zoo (at 12pm!)
We finally arrive at the Zoo with a packed car (a friend came with us) and met more friends there. It was a beautiful sunny day and I just hoped for a day without much drama. I am proud to say that both of my children behaved. I received several compliments about my 2 year old and how well-behaved she was and also about the baby who slept most of the day (I knew I would pay for this later, but I'll tell you about that on another post).
We saw bears and leopards and turtles- it was such a great day!!! My two year old kept saying "Look mommy, the animals" with a HUGE smile on her face- I would not trade this for anything in the world!
I must say it was very sad to see a skinny polar bear and other animals that just seemed so out of their element. And so, dare I say, unhealthy. I know that I selfishly love to have easy access to these animals, but at what cost to them??? I will post pics so you can see what I mean. The leopards/panthers who I know need space to run had literally a closet space to live in so they certainly had no room to run. IT WAS SO SAD!
However, we did have a great day and my daughter felt like she was in a personal episode of Go Diego Go. She even pretended to have her binoculars all day- it was the cutest thing EVER!! If you've seen Diego, you know what I mean.
Well, I'm off to bed. My sister is staying over so that she can stay up with the baby and I can get some sleep- God Bless Her, but I don't think she knows what she's in for. Selfishly I won't tell her... I really need some rest.

Parenting- the only job that's really FULL TIME

What a crazy day today.... i can't believe that although it has been two years I have become so unaccustomed to random crying fits. I am reminded that my older daughter did not cry the way my current baby does, but i hardly believe that. I feel like when i think hard enough I remember being told that she cries too much, but since she was the only one in the house at the time I did not notice so much. The problem is now i am trying to stop one from crying so that the other one does not start and well all in all so that i do not start. I am not proud to admit that i had two visits to the bathroom today where i sat on my toilet contemplating my next move (while sobbing into my hands). Really??? What plan did I think i would come up with? Like there's a science to this whole motherhood thing... obviously if it was that easy there wouldn't be endless books, articles and even blogs about the topic. THIS IS A FULL TIME JOB..... and yet supposedly that doesn't start for a few weeks!

150lbs and 4yo??? How did this happen?

So I got o pick up my daughters at day care today (first day of the baby at day care- a trial run i guess you can call it) and i sat down to speak to the sitter for a little bit. I think I just felt so good to have a day to myself after so many months I didn't want to think about how soon I would be back home to feeding/diapering/coloring/reading/cooking, etc all at the same time (practically). Anyway, so I sit to talk to her about the children (mine are 2 of five that she currently has- one being her grand-daughter) and she is telling me about the 4 month old that she has and how much she is currently eating. Now, i try not to judge parents as i see many people passing judgment on me and i want to SCREAM, but let me explain.... she is four months old and since she was 2 MONTHS OLD she has been eating solids (well puree but you get the point). I thought this was unheard of but her mom claims the doctor recommended it. (I want to ask her the Dr's name so I make sure to never go anywhere near him/her). She is currently what i would consider a very overweight child. I don't know lbs per say but let me just say that it is not a far stretch to say it is more comfortable to pick up my 2 year old for a 1/2 hr than to pick her up. Mind you my daughter is on the skinny side because of her height, but really this girl is 4 months old. She eats 6 oz of milk and then proceeds to eat a plate of veggies AND a plate of fruit..... are u kidding me???? And her mom is not on alert? Obesity is rampid in this country and it is a health concern- does she not see this? or does she not care? That's what i want to know! So the sitter has told her this is really not a good idea and has tried to feed her less just to see if she can make her diet a little more normal- she cries until she is fed her usual surplus of food. So, now to my 150lb 4 yr old- yes people I said 150LBS!!!!!!!!! It is the 4 month old's cousin and at age 4 he was 150lbs. He has been hospitalized mutliple times for heart problems and he has a sister that is 2 years younger and following in the same footsteps...... is it a stretch to say this is abuse??? Apparently he and his sister can finish (and have many a times) an 8-slice pie of pizza by themselves! I mean everyone loves a chubby little baby to squeeze their cheeks, but isn't this going a bit too far??? This is adult weight! ugh! I don't even know what to say....i'm appalled.

I'm back and I'm here to stay- i hope

So, I have not written in a long time. This was mostly due to a busy schedule and i guess also a need that was met by other means.... I no longer feel that way. I need to speak out on certain things and since this is "the thinks i think" this is the perfect way for me!
I am happy to say that today is a good day- my daughters are both napping (2yo and 2mos old) it won't last long so I will be quick. First, I want to make a quick comment on the headline-making Chris and Rihanna ordeal- I know many people were expecting her to be a role model for battered women, but jsut because she is a celebrity does not mean that the cycle of abuse has not hit her smack in the face (no pun intended, I swear). She has believed a man that she loves that he will not hit her again, is she stupid for doing it , probaby but is this what usually happens in DV cases-YES! I pray for you Rihanna that he does not hit you again. Second, I would like to address this whole Michael Jackson going back on tour thing. Do we really care??? (in the words of MC in Home ALone) I DON"T THINK SO! Finally, my wrap up is regarding R.Kelly and his infamous sex tape. So, not ony is this fool (for lack of better curse word i cannot use) getting away with something he clearly did (no i do not believe if the glove don't fit you must acquit, he was a liar too) but someone he paid to get rid of tapes that would make him guilty has to chase after him to get paid- U ARE SCUM! Is it that America forgets the wrongs that people have done because they are good looking or can make good music????? I don't know about CB just yet. I have not made up my mind. I mean, he is a victim of what he has seen (more on that later) but R. Kelly does not get play in my presence I DO NOT CARE- I have two little girls i love/respect way too much to have them grow up listening to him! THE END. (enter screaming child wanting to be let out of bed-i knew this wouldn't last).