Tuesday, May 19, 2009
Discipline: Is it only a parent's job?
I follow another blog very irregularly, but I like it because of the different topics that are posted, see it here. This particular post about disciplining other people children really hit a nerve, so I am further asking the question... how do you feel??? If someone other than yourself tries to discipline your child, is that okay? Are there certain instances when it is/ isn't ok? Let me know your thoughts.
Thursday, May 14, 2009
Mother's Day Mayhem!
It's taken a few days to write about the events surrounding this year's Mother's Day because it has taken me this long to recover from it. However, let me not be horrible and neglect the wonderful things that happened in the morning.
I had requested a meal cooked by hubby as my gift because while some of you are lucky enough to share that chore, I am not! To me it's a chore since I don't willingly choose to cook everyday. I have to cook or my family will starve (hubby doesn't cook) or go broke from ordering out. So my hubby chose to make me breakfast (a delicious omelet with toast and turkey bacon). I also got flowers and many many kisses and I love you's from the girls. What a great beginning to my first Mother's Day as a mom of two!
Later in the day my mom came by with my sister and we decided to head out to hubby's family's house to say hello and possibly eat some delicious food. It was a sunny day that was looking as cheerful as any day can possibly look, but I still didn't know what I was in for.
Fast forward to hours later when my purse spills out in the middle of the street. I'm talking NOTHING left in the purse but possibly some lint that had been accumulating for months! And by "in the middle of the street" I am not just saying that, I mean it literally! Hubby and I hurry to pick everything up as quick as possible, all the while I am saying PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE let me pick everything up that I had in here... do not let me forget anything! Now, we all know the cardinal rule about the second you say "don't forget", that's the second that well, you "forget" whatever it is you didn't want to forget.
Well, thinking I had everything in my purse, we head out to have our early dinner at Mama Mexico. It is such a fabolous place! I had never been there before and let me tell you the most important factor- they are totally kid friendly! Our waitress was very nice and smiled at us the whole time, even when my daughter spilled a whole glass of Sangria that she had just finished pouring. She just shrugged it off and said "It's okay". I've been to plenty of places that would've rolled their eyes and looked at us like "you better leave now"! None of that there. The food was also spectacular!!! We had their famous guacamole that they make at your table, to your liking. We split the paella and the Churrasco (skirt steak) and it was just divine. All together it was a great time.
The one thing we did joke about was how they placed us in a corner away from most others, but they didn't make us feel like they didn't want us there, I think it just happened to be the table that was open. Either way, I HIGHLY recommend Mama Mexico for families and for a date night. My mom told me that she has been there during the evening when they have a mariachi band and hand out shots to people who wish to take them [just to spice things up :) ].
Now, to my drama! So we finally get home and I'm searching and searching for my keys- nowhere to be found! Mind you, right then I have this vision of my keys next to my birth control laying in the grass and I remember thinking I better go grab that and I NEVER did! So, here I am, no house keys, no car keys, no mailbox key, and no birth control! I just about lose it! I head back to where I last saw my keys (45 minutes away) and they are obviously not there. You must be thinking, what's the big deal? You must have a copy of your car keys? Well, of the Honda, yes, but of my Hoopty that I have to drop off and pick up my girls to facilitate my life- NO!
To make a long story short, my dad ends up coming by with his mechanic to rip out the ignition to the car and put a new one in, but it's not that easy. There's apparently a chip that needs to be removed so I have to call a locksmith to do the job. So, after 2 days and $275 are spent I now have a car that I can use. (Did I mention the car happened to be parked at a meter because it was Sunday??? And YES I did get a ticket despite calling the parking authority and letting them know my situation). What about my birth control, you ask? I can't get it again till next week when insurance will cover it, so it will be alternative methods till then.
So, HUGE lessons learned- 1) make a million copies of every key and have copies everywhere because you don't want to get caught like me spending insane amounts of money to pay for a new one! AND 2) if you happen to spill your purse out, make sure you have absolutely EVERYTHING when you pick things up!
I had requested a meal cooked by hubby as my gift because while some of you are lucky enough to share that chore, I am not! To me it's a chore since I don't willingly choose to cook everyday. I have to cook or my family will starve (hubby doesn't cook) or go broke from ordering out. So my hubby chose to make me breakfast (a delicious omelet with toast and turkey bacon). I also got flowers and many many kisses and I love you's from the girls. What a great beginning to my first Mother's Day as a mom of two!
Later in the day my mom came by with my sister and we decided to head out to hubby's family's house to say hello and possibly eat some delicious food. It was a sunny day that was looking as cheerful as any day can possibly look, but I still didn't know what I was in for.
Fast forward to hours later when my purse spills out in the middle of the street. I'm talking NOTHING left in the purse but possibly some lint that had been accumulating for months! And by "in the middle of the street" I am not just saying that, I mean it literally! Hubby and I hurry to pick everything up as quick as possible, all the while I am saying PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE let me pick everything up that I had in here... do not let me forget anything! Now, we all know the cardinal rule about the second you say "don't forget", that's the second that well, you "forget" whatever it is you didn't want to forget.
Well, thinking I had everything in my purse, we head out to have our early dinner at Mama Mexico. It is such a fabolous place! I had never been there before and let me tell you the most important factor- they are totally kid friendly! Our waitress was very nice and smiled at us the whole time, even when my daughter spilled a whole glass of Sangria that she had just finished pouring. She just shrugged it off and said "It's okay". I've been to plenty of places that would've rolled their eyes and looked at us like "you better leave now"! None of that there. The food was also spectacular!!! We had their famous guacamole that they make at your table, to your liking. We split the paella and the Churrasco (skirt steak) and it was just divine. All together it was a great time.
The one thing we did joke about was how they placed us in a corner away from most others, but they didn't make us feel like they didn't want us there, I think it just happened to be the table that was open. Either way, I HIGHLY recommend Mama Mexico for families and for a date night. My mom told me that she has been there during the evening when they have a mariachi band and hand out shots to people who wish to take them [just to spice things up :) ].
Now, to my drama! So we finally get home and I'm searching and searching for my keys- nowhere to be found! Mind you, right then I have this vision of my keys next to my birth control laying in the grass and I remember thinking I better go grab that and I NEVER did! So, here I am, no house keys, no car keys, no mailbox key, and no birth control! I just about lose it! I head back to where I last saw my keys (45 minutes away) and they are obviously not there. You must be thinking, what's the big deal? You must have a copy of your car keys? Well, of the Honda, yes, but of my Hoopty that I have to drop off and pick up my girls to facilitate my life- NO!
To make a long story short, my dad ends up coming by with his mechanic to rip out the ignition to the car and put a new one in, but it's not that easy. There's apparently a chip that needs to be removed so I have to call a locksmith to do the job. So, after 2 days and $275 are spent I now have a car that I can use. (Did I mention the car happened to be parked at a meter because it was Sunday??? And YES I did get a ticket despite calling the parking authority and letting them know my situation). What about my birth control, you ask? I can't get it again till next week when insurance will cover it, so it will be alternative methods till then.
So, HUGE lessons learned- 1) make a million copies of every key and have copies everywhere because you don't want to get caught like me spending insane amounts of money to pay for a new one! AND 2) if you happen to spill your purse out, make sure you have absolutely EVERYTHING when you pick things up!
Monday, May 4, 2009
SUPER WOMAN
I was having a very interesting conversation today with a friend of mine about the things that we won't dare say to people about our kids and certain feelings (deep down inside) that come up. The thing is, I feel like so many women can relate to feeling so down in the dumps that it feels like if we tell someone then we are guilty. Of what, you ask? I don't know. Just guilty. Maybe, to a mom, guilty of not loving her kids enough. To a wife, maybe of not loving her husband enough. To a woman, maybe of not loving herself enough. The common thing is that feeling of guilt that overrides any sensation to just tell someone how you are feeling in the hope that someone can relate. But how do you tell someone that you think you're not ready to be a mom and you have two kids? How do you tell someone that you don't know if you are in love with your husband and you have been married for 10 years? How do you tell someone that you have been one step away from falling so deep in a depression you couldn't dream of getting out? You can't and you know you can't because we women have a cape that has been placed on us over generations.
We have been told that we can offer help, but don't dare ever REALLY ask for it. We can cry and we can tell people what we are feeling, but we are told to never really show weakness. I don't know if this is more of a Latina thing, but I know I have spoken to others who are not and they can relate. They relate to this idea that we place on ourselves of this unbreakable, unbeatable SUPERWOMAN.
I have to openly admit that I have been guilty of this. A perfect example is when I went back to work and Leeya was finally sleeping better and it seemed like her colic had subsided, I began to tell people how horrible I was feeling being home and how all I wanted was to be at work because that I knew how to do. That was something I knew I was good at. Everyone kept asking why I hadn't said anything earlier and while I kept giving roundabout answers I realized that I did not give anyone a straight answer and I think the reason for that was that I didn't have one. I didn't know why I didn't tell people, but as I reflected and continue to reflect back I realize that it was mostly because I did not want to admit to myself that I was miserable. I was certainly not depressed because though I cried- oh boy did I cry- I didn't feel miserable ALL THE TIME. I just couldn't fathom why things had felt so right with my first baby and not with the second. I really thought because this was the second time around that I would be "used to it" and know "just what to do". I know it seems ridiculous, but I thought it and when it wasn't like that I thought it was my fault.
I guess what I'm trying to say is, I am working on taking off this cape and I know you can too! I have been doing a lot of thinking and I know that this won't be easy but I have not been honest with myself and if I can't be honest with me then who can I be honest with? I know now that I can be a "super" mom, but don't have to be "supermom" and more importantly I can be a "super" woman, but don't have to be "Superwoman".
Have you ever felt like a "super" woman or do you feel like you have to be Superwoman?
We have been told that we can offer help, but don't dare ever REALLY ask for it. We can cry and we can tell people what we are feeling, but we are told to never really show weakness. I don't know if this is more of a Latina thing, but I know I have spoken to others who are not and they can relate. They relate to this idea that we place on ourselves of this unbreakable, unbeatable SUPERWOMAN.
I have to openly admit that I have been guilty of this. A perfect example is when I went back to work and Leeya was finally sleeping better and it seemed like her colic had subsided, I began to tell people how horrible I was feeling being home and how all I wanted was to be at work because that I knew how to do. That was something I knew I was good at. Everyone kept asking why I hadn't said anything earlier and while I kept giving roundabout answers I realized that I did not give anyone a straight answer and I think the reason for that was that I didn't have one. I didn't know why I didn't tell people, but as I reflected and continue to reflect back I realize that it was mostly because I did not want to admit to myself that I was miserable. I was certainly not depressed because though I cried- oh boy did I cry- I didn't feel miserable ALL THE TIME. I just couldn't fathom why things had felt so right with my first baby and not with the second. I really thought because this was the second time around that I would be "used to it" and know "just what to do". I know it seems ridiculous, but I thought it and when it wasn't like that I thought it was my fault.
I guess what I'm trying to say is, I am working on taking off this cape and I know you can too! I have been doing a lot of thinking and I know that this won't be easy but I have not been honest with myself and if I can't be honest with me then who can I be honest with? I know now that I can be a "super" mom, but don't have to be "supermom" and more importantly I can be a "super" woman, but don't have to be "Superwoman".
Have you ever felt like a "super" woman or do you feel like you have to be Superwoman?
Saturday, May 2, 2009
Short and sweet....
WOW! Everyone is asleep and by everyone I mean everyone!!! No TV's no nothing, just me and the computer. (Much needed side note before I start).
Liana saw Leeya for the first time this morning since we dropped her off a week ago. It was the cutest thing in the world, because she got on my bed (as she usually does to give her daddy a kiss and peeked into the pack n play (where Leeya currently sleeps) and she says "Baby sister!!! Oh look at baby sister, SO CUTE!" (and proceeded to stand on my bed and reach in to give her a kiss! It was really cute. Like I said, I think she really missed her. It kind of makes you wonder about what else Liana thinks about and how much she is really missing things/people when she says so and not just screaming whining about something she wants- NOW!
Liana saw Leeya for the first time this morning since we dropped her off a week ago. It was the cutest thing in the world, because she got on my bed (as she usually does to give her daddy a kiss and peeked into the pack n play (where Leeya currently sleeps) and she says "Baby sister!!! Oh look at baby sister, SO CUTE!" (and proceeded to stand on my bed and reach in to give her a kiss! It was really cute. Like I said, I think she really missed her. It kind of makes you wonder about what else Liana thinks about and how much she is really missing things/people when she says so and not just screaming whining about something she wants- NOW!
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)